In this week’s column, I wanted to have a little fun. As a former math teacher, I have an odd sense of humor and wanted to give you a little peek into my silly, educational mind. I hope you enjoy these love letters between shapes.
My Dearest Rhombus,
Shall I compare you to any other polygon? No, indeed. Your attributes are far greater still. Four vertices-two acute, two obtuse; oh, no other is as perfect as you. Two sets of parallel lines and four equal sides. What geometric shape even comes close to matching your qualities?
I see the square, but he’s so plain. Four ninety degree angles, every angle looks the same. Oh Rhombus, your angles show such diversity. The square pales in comparison.
Some would ask: why not a triangle? There are so many to choose from: equilateral, isosceles, scalene. I loved a scalene triangle once, many years ago. Her angles were acute and obtuse just like you, but there was not stability, no consistency. All of the angles were different and we just weren’t a good fit.
But you, my love, my Dearest Rhombus, my two-dimensional vision of ecstasy; you are who I dream of. I see kites flying in the sky and I think of you. I see a chain linked fence and my heart skips a beat. Stained glass windows and sparkly jewels and oh, the chasm between us seems so vast.
I have just one question for you: Will you be my one and only true love?
I am flattered, really, but I don’t think you are my type. I am looking for someone with depth and more well-rounded. I’m just not a straight-edge kind of gal. I know, I know I have four sides. I may seem flat and lacking depth. It’s true, at times, but at least I am consistent.
I think that’s why I am so attracted to Sphere. He never gets stuck at the intersections of life and just seems to know how to roll with things. He loves to be outside, and honestly I am quite the perfect fit; I mean, every baseball needs a diamond.
I’m sorry we couldn’t work things out, Trapezoid. I feel like you are a perfect blend of being acute and obtuse all at the same time. Your flat thinking makes me want to move on from all of these immature polygons. Maybe you should give Parallelogram a call; you seem to have a lot in common.
I may just be chasing a rolling stone, but I really want to give it a try with Sphere. Nothing personal, but he offers so much more.
Wishing You the Best,