Leader By Default
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Daniel is eight and Carter is twelve. From the time Daniel’s feet hit the ground, he’s been following behind his big brother. They shared a room for the first six years of life, Carter on the top bunk, Daniel on the bottom. Most nights, Carter started on the bottom bed with Daniel either reading to him or playing silly games with Daniel’s stuffed animals. I’m pretty sure Carter is Daniel’s favorite person on this planet.
Is it because Carter takes time to be a kind big brother? I’m sure that helps. Or maybe it’s because he reads to him or plays silly games? That definitely helps. In all honesty, I think Daniel is drawn to Carter because of his position and relationship in life.
Carter is the big brother. He is more capable. Understands details. Has understanding and experience. Whether he displays positive qualities or not, Daniel still longs for the attention, approval, and acceptance of his older brother.
The same is true for us. There are certain people who are either older, or further along, that we are automatically drawn to. We see their lives and look to them as leaders. They can tell us all day long they aren’t leadership material, but for whatever reason, we can’t turn off the watching eyes and the need to follow.
And on the flip side, we are being watched too. Followed. We are leaders by default, even if we aren’t ready. Even if we think we have nothing good about ourselves to offer. Even if we are still struggling to figure out how to do things right.
If you are breathing, someone is watching your life. Just as we watch others, we can’t tell those who watch us to stop. Others are going to follow our lead regardless of our readiness.
The question is: where are you leading them?
Kim Janine Ligon
Such a good point. We may have the most influence in others when we don’t even realize it. That means you should always act in a way you would be proud for someone else to emulate. Great topic.