As many of you know, I’ve been having some issues with my heart. At my follow-up appointment this week I finally received answers. Not what I wanted, but honestly it was the best news possible.

I wanted my heart to be the reason I was more tired than usual. I wanted my heart to be the reason I’ve had trouble managing normal, everyday stressors. I wanted my heart to be the reason I was mentally foggy.

But overall, my heart is okay. I do have what is called Super Ventricular Tachycardia. My doctor told me I was not crazy, that in fact, I was feeling abnormal rhythms and racing in my heart and have started a medication to help with this. He then gently informed me that while, yes, my heart monitor recorded these irregularities, the off beats all occurred in a certain region of the heart and in such a way that they were all influenced by outside factors.

I suggested the outside factors I knew impacted my heart at different times. Dehydration. Excessive sugar. Caffeine. Overexertion. I’ve been working on these for years, so I knew these were outside influences.

Then my doctor, as gently as he could, explained that yes, those were all outside influences, but mismanagement of stress and increased anxiety were the most likely causes. Yes, the other areas were influences from time to time, but he encouraged me to pay attention to my outside stressors and either eliminate them or find new ways to handle them.

So, the real problem with my heart is not my heart. The real problem is the amount of emotional and mental weight I’ve chosen to carry, shove down deep, and let weigh me down for way too long. Being busy, while productive and important at times, isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

This appointment humbled me. I go and go, like the Energizer Bunny, pushing my mind and body harder than necessary, and now my physical heart is paying for my hardheadedness. Years of major events which I never slowed down enough to process have built up like residue on my emotional heart and now my capacity to keep pushing through is inhibited. At some point the junk in our trunks gets too heavy and must be cleaned out. I guess I’m there.

I appreciate all the prayers for my health. Please don’t stop. As we have all learned, our physical health is directly connected to our emotional, mental, and spiritual health too.

If I could share any word with you this week, I would say don’t put off what you need to deal with today. This huge mountain in front of me is a lot harder to move than the little hills I could have mastered if I had not been busy and shoving things away.

Have any of you ever dealt with something similar? I’d love to hear your stories.