Shoulds Aren’t Reality

Posted On March 11, 2022March 11, 2022

“Okay. Here’s the plan. You stand back here with the push broom and steer him if he runs your way. I’m gonna’ to take the BB gun and aim it under the shower stall. Boys, one of you stand at each entrance with a piece of wood ready to whack him. Here we go.”

He shot, we waited. He poked a wire hanger, walking stick, and piece of wood underneath. Finally, after almost two hours, we heard from a friend that wasp spray was the way to go. Within minutes of one squirt, that rat couldn’t stand it. He scampered past my push broom, into the vacant living room, and disappeared into the scissor lift.

“It’s on!” yelled my husband as he flipped the switch of the scissor lift to the on position.

“There he is! I see him!” one of the boys yelled. Within seconds, the rat was caught and served his eviction notice.

So, how did a rat come to live under my shower? Isn’t that a lovely question. We are in the middle of a house build and have procrastinated for months getting the house sealed up appropriately. It’s almost time to finish the master bathroom, so I looked under the tub and shower. I. Was. Horrified. Mounds of insulation, small pieces of wood, wire nuts, trash, string, leaves, hickory nuts, and other random junk was all underneath.

“Enough,” I told my husband. “It’s me or him. Something’s gotta’ give.”

We spent the weekend putting in the side door and sealing up the front entrance so we could catch the rat that shouldn’t have been there in the first place.

I was talking with someone this week who has been carrying around a lot of baggage. “I shouldn’t feel this way,” she said.

“Well, whether you should or shouldn’t, you still do, so it’s time to call it what it is and get rid of it.”

Just like that daggum rat should never have been in my house, the reality was that he existed and had to go. And the reality with us is the same—whether we should or shouldn’t feel a certain way isn’t the real struggle, it’s the fact that we do.

Sometimes we are angry when we know we shouldn’t be. Or we get our feelings hurt and tell ourselves to suck it up and move on. Other times we are sick and tired of being sick and tired and convince ourselves that we should get a grip and move on.

Even when we think we shouldn’t have a struggle, we can’t deny its existence. Just like that rat moved in, took over, and wreaked havoc, our emotions, even ones we shouldn’t have, can move in, take over, and wreak havoc in our lives. Especially when we continually shove them under the proverbial rug.

Name the emotion. Own it. Then deal with the struggle before you find a piled-up heap of randomness under your tub and have to call in the armed cavalry to take it out. Just because it shouldn’t be there doesn’t mean it isn’t. Happy hunting this week as you chase down all of those should and shouldn’ts and serve them their official eviction notice.

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