Rock Bottom
I received a call from a special friend this week. My heart was full hearing her voice on the other end of the line as we hadn’t spoken in months. This friend made some poor choices which led to more poor choices, and eventually she hit rock bottom. Again.
Again? Yes. Again.
Rock bottom isn’t a one-time experience, especially when it’s an area that controlled us so entirely for a long span of time. Depression. Addiction. Anxiety. Fear. These can all lead us to low places where we fall hard.
When we fall that first time, getting up seems impossible. Hope is a foreign concept and wholeness seems like a distant country. But when we take the steps to get help and move forward, we begin to realize we might actually make it off the bottom. And with baby steps, we move toward a better version of ourselves. Maybe we reconnect with God and join a recovery group. Or we get involved in church or bible study. And maybe even add therapy and accountability.
After falling hard this first time, learning to stand and walk in newfound freedom seems miraculous. At first, we are careful to keep our safeguards and accountability in place. Nothing will take away the peace and contentment we feel. There’s no way we will ever go back to that old way of life.
Joy radiates. Hope emanates. Freedom resonates.
Rock Bottom. Again.
Until temptation comes knocking. We’re strong in the beginning, but often we are convinced that one taste of the old life won’t hurt. We’re on the other side, after all. One drink. One thought. One action. One movie. One choice. And it may bring satisfaction for the moment, but when we choose to do it again. Then again. That’s when the spiral happens. And before long, we’ve hit rock bottom. Again.
But here’s the danger of this second fall: the shame of confessing that we have fallen often keeps us silent.
“What will people think?”
“I’m supposed to be on the other side.”
“I’m going to let everyone down.”
“But I’m a leader now, I can’t let others see my mess ups.”
These thoughts will keep us trapped. Isolated. Stuck. We desperately need help. Again. But we are too prideful. Too fearful. Too insecure.
So, we stand at the crossroads, where my friend stood this week. The old way of living isn’t working. We are empty. Low. Broken. And don’t have the strength to fight ourselves by ourselves. We. Need. Help. But is it worth losing everything? Again? Is it worth the embarrassment of failure? The risk of losing relationships? The possibility of getting fired? Going to jail? Voluntarily entering rehab? Seeking forgiveness and eating crow?
YES. YES. YES.
Don’t Stay at Rock Bottom
My friend chose to give up everything she had to get the help she needs. Again. And no matter how many times we fall, we need to keep getting up and try again. It’s worth losing it all. It’s worth the biggest fear we can muster. It’s worth doing, even though the excuses try to convince us otherwise.
Are you at rock bottom? Again?
Be brave. Do the best thing for yourself. Confess. Get help. No matter the cost. No matter the embarrassment. Complete wholeness, peace, contentment, and freedom is worth whatever you might consider gain in the moment.
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