Prayer of a Mom

Riding in the car this morning, I found myself singing along with the radio, “Holy Spirit, you are welcome here…”. I stopped singing and began praying. God, I miss you. I miss the times we used to spend, just the two of us. I miss getting up early and sitting quietly waiting to hear from you. I miss what our relationship used to look like…but as much as I miss it, I wouldn’t trade where you have me now. I may not get to spend uninterrupted time alone with you, but I see you in everything I do. I see you in the miracle of life as I look into the face of my baby boy. I see you in the curious questions of my four year old and in the way he loves his brother. Your hand is unmistakable as I consider the flexibility of my job and it was only by your hand that the doors opened in the first place. I see you in our finances and friendships, in our marriage and our focus. When it’s chaotic you bring your peace. When I’m tired, you bring unexpected rest. When I am frustrated you reassure my anxious heart. When I’m fearful you whisper to my soul. When all I see are doubts and negative circumstances, you shine your light on the blessings. And I’m reminded that your are, indeed, a good Father, and that’s just who you are. You and I will have our long mornings again, but until that day, help me be a good mother. Show me how to love my kids in a way that points to you. I will only have small children once and I’m going to miss these crazy days as the years pass. Don’t let me miss the blessings of the day because I’m blinded by earthly circumstances. Hold me up. Give me your strength. Keep my eyes opened. I just need to keep seeing you in all that I do.