It’s Not What It Looks Like
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From the outside, her world looked perfect. Devoutly religious. A large family. A respected husband. Service-minded. If I had seen her on the street, I would think she had it all together.
As I talked with her, I quickly recognized she wasn’t “crazy”. Instead, what I saw was a deeply scarred woman who has been trapped in an abusive situation with no way out. Sara* had been tossed around from one mental institution to another for years.
She shared vulnerably in hushed tones, checking over her shoulder to make sure no one heard. Her story broke my heart. The manipulation of her husband paired with the injustice of their religious institution painted her as the bad guy instead of the victim. She’s lost rights to her children and the only life she’s ever known.
But as we talked, her eyes expressed hope. Never had she heard teaching on grace and Christ like she was hearing now. Religion wasn’t salvation. Rules, service, and obedience weren’t a pass to heaven. She desperately longed for a relationship of unconditional love from her heavenly Father instead of the conditions placed on her by her religious group and household. The message shared with her that day filled the hole she’d always had in her heart and now, she felt alive for the first time.
Outside appearances aren’t always accurate. It’s like judging a book by its cover, or assuming someone understands without telling them. We look at others and think they are handling life so well because their edges seem tight and neat. But have we ever taken the time to truly see them? Know them? Engage with them?
This encounter rocked my world and made me look at my stereotypical judgments that often arise. Just because someone’s life seems grand from the outside doesn’t mean that they aren’t living in their own version of hell on earth. Smiles can be faked. Appearances can be masked. And hurts can be hidden. Don’t we do the same?
Take time to invest in people. Talk with them. Ask questions. Engage and see them. We all have a deep desire to be seen and known. And as we look past the facade, may we feel the angst of their soul. People matter. Let’s show them this week.
*changed her name for privacy
